I'm in Tallahassee now! I cannot tell you how different it is- totally different world/experience than the first year of my mission my whole world is different but my work and my purpose is the same so i'm just fine. I have actually NEVER been anywhere like Tallahassee before- the college part of it with all the campuses and restaurants and city parts reminds me of Provo which is weird because I feel like my "college life" is a dream and I have really just been a missionary my whole life- so its weird haha. but the other parts? wow...hoods. a lot of ghetto areas oh dad you would die if you saw some of the areas we go into!! so would you mom- it is a whole other world like I have never seen before and we are the only 2 white girls in it and we have skirts and name-tags to complete it ha- its crazy!! I know if I were not a set apart missionary I would never be in this place but because I am I get to and I love that- its amazing. I love these people!!!! I fell in love with them! and I'm glad i did because leaving Gulf breeze and those people that i gave my heart to was HARD. Hernandez's was hard. Jaecy was hard..sis. stubbs. Carla...I didnt cry saying goodbye to anyone until her- i was fine until i walked down the steps of her trailer and looked behind me at her in the doorway holding braedon- sobs just rose out of me I could not control! I ran back to her and she started sobbing too it was pretty bad- i thought my heart would burst- she has changed so much! she said, "Im gonna prove you right sis. B! Im gonna prove you right and make you proud and not give up. God wont give up on me either." she will be okay i just told her how much i love her. always will.
However- I was ready to leave and have a new adventure and go where God wants me and where people need me- i felt great peace as I prayed and relied on God he gave me strength. Also some more news- I didnt know until transfers- but I am actually the head sister training leader along with my companion sis. Harris. we are basically the female AP's of the mission and over all the sisters (that is how its been described to me) and our responsibilities include not only training the sisters in our zone, but training all the other sister training leaders of the mission! we also work closely with the mission president and His wife, the AP's, and teach at zone conferences and attend the leadership meetings. what an honor- so much work and responsibility- I cannot express how busy we are and how much we do in addition to our missionary work responsibilities working with all the sisters- but I LOVE IT!!!!
The Lord knows me well- he knows what I need- this leadership responsibility motivates me and helped me to be excited to leave Gulf Breeze and take on this new world- how President put it- "this is going to change your mission experience." leadership. I love it. I am fully incapable without the Lord and rely on Him fully- I cannot stress this enough!! I would be lost without His blessings and the guidance and direction and inspiration of His Spirit. But I am honored and humbled for this leadership opportunity and trust. It has caused me to really step up my game- the Lord has let me know how I can improve- we need to be model, ideal, example sister missionaries because literally every sister in this mission looks to us as an example and sister Harris is AMAZING- exactly obedient to EVERY mission rule- there is nothing we let slide or be sloppy i have never lived to tightly in and regimented in my life. we even wake up earlier than everyone else just so we are exactly on time. we work 13 hour days...at first i was panicked and felt i could never truly live this way everyday- but I made a decision- I would not be called to this position if I couldn't do it- God is trying to mld me and He does this through asking us to submit our will and obey him in ALL THINGS- so I got on my knees, cried, prayed, and prayed and prayed. I asked Him to strengthen me and told Him I was willing to do it if He would just be by my side the whole time and help me love the people and find the people he sent me here for. then I got up and wow- did He show forth His power!! He has never left my side since. I feel enhanced patience, and my headaches have subsided, He literally has enhanced my endurance and attitude and mental clarity. And on top of that? We have already seen miracles!!
I love sister Harris she is incredible- our apartment is only one room, one bathroom and a kitchen. I love sister Harris and we are such good friends that we truly strengthen each other. We have less time than other sisters to work- and sis. Harris was worried our area would suffer but I said that God would bring us people and help us in our work as He sees us doing our other responsibilities- and He did!! we received a referral saturday night- her name is LaShawn- and guess what?! she came to church the next day and after church we had the Plan of Salvation lesson with her and it went AMAZING!! I have never seen such a powerful lesson- she is SO prepared.
I sat with her all day in church and we just talked and talked and I just fell in love her! we have another appointment with her Wednesday. Miraculous. Humbling. Incredible. This is God's work- I love being a part of it. At the end of the lesson she was baffled and said she had been looking for these answers for 10 years and couldnt believe we just answered them all. we have sisters on FSU campus and they gave her bf our card which is how she got ahold of us!! at the end of the lesson she gave the prayer- the most beautiful prayer i have ever heard, it was like a whisper..and she cried the whole time- after we were hugging and she looked at me and said, "I swear I know your face- I know you from somewhere...I know your face" i just looked at her and sister Harris pointed to the picture of the Spirit world and she cried and said, "oh sista I knew you there!!" and she cried and hugged me more. wow. LaShawn is a young, beautiful black woman with a 2 yr old daughter. I love her. There are many other stories but I am out of time.
We are not taking a break for Christmas we decided we are going to make a list of lonely people here and spend all day seeing all of them- I am SO EXCITED!! we are going to find the mr. Kreugers of tallahassee :))) also! funny story- we were going to contact another referral (we get tons :) and on our way there we were shocked to see a police man there arresting her for battery!! she wasnt there but we gave him her info so he could find her...haha welcome to Tallahassee!! guess we wont be teaching her...haha we had a good laugh. I really want pictures and letters from yall- my new address is:
1900 Centre Pointe Blvd. #213
Tallahassee, FL 32308
we also volunteer at a shelter that gives out free groceries to homeless people- we do it 2 hours every sat- I have NEVER seen such poverty- I felt in another world it made me cry to see person after person, family after family in the cold, and have to check them in, and see their joy and gratitude after receiving a bag of food- it made me cry. I love this work though. My favorite thing to be called is "Sis. B" other than mom or wife- I think 'Sis. B" will always be my favorite title because of the people who have called me by that name. I love you all and look forward to skyping with you next week. Merry Christmas! I love you family so much.
Sis. B
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