The best decision I ever made.

Dear Family.

The best decision I ever made was to come out and work full time for my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, and my God. A full 18 months. Words will never be able to convey the depth of how I feel. Sometimes I wonder- why does God love me so much? Why does God care so much about me that He has worked with me so tediously, painstakingly, patiently, specifically, and line by line all in an effort to help me to become? I have found that the more I invest in Him and show Him how much I care about becoming the woman and being and soul He wants me to be, the more He invests in me and helps me to accomplish that deep, deep desire. It means I get more challenges, go through harder things- it means he starts requiring more of me and giving me more responsibilities- the tests get a little harder, the pain a little deeper, the pressure a little hotter, the tasks a bit more trying, exhausting and direct - but all the while it keeps me closer to Him because it's like we're working together to accomplish the thing I know I asked Him for in the first place- so I can't complain. I can only yoke myself to home, rely on him and press on hand in hand with Him. To go through such experiences is not possible to do without Him - it would be too hard- but with Him it is absolutely possible and the growth is absolutely real. my heart is absolutely changed. and my character is chiseled. My sense of self absolutely purer. I have the eyes to see things as they really are, the understanding to discern the lies and wiles of the adversary from the truths and assurances from God. My patience and lover for others is bolstered- I can better see them as He does. My desires are not what they were- though some of the noble desires I had before still remain with deepened resolve to accomplish them. I know that things will happen in God's time, in His way, and that opposition is necessary for our growth. I have learned to accept things I previously struggled to, and I have felt increased peace and ability to do more good for others as I have done so, and above all I have learned to trust God and live for Him. I have learned you don't have to be perfect to be pure - its in the striving and the cleaving unto Him and the Spirit that sanctification comes- and I am at full fulfillment, peace and feeling wholly calm and collected. How great is my God! I will never doubt my God! I will never get over How He has worked with me, and let me work for others, and literally as i lost myself in striving to help others to draw closer to Him and fulfill their full potential, it I He pulled in closer to Him, along with those I had the privilege and honor to teach. I am absolutely in awe of Him and His love.

I bore my testimony for the last time as a full time missionary of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter day Saints. so surreal. I didn't cry- I just felt at peace and fulfilled. I spoke what I knew was true. but I will never forget what it felt like to say the words, "it's been a privilege to serve you for the past 7 months, and it has been a privilege to serve my Heavenly Father for 18 months." I was overcome with emotion at saying that- but not to the eye, just internally. I thought- no one knows all I have experienced but God- then I felt very near to Him in that moment. There were many goodbyes, and tears, some were very hard for me to part with- jessica being one of them- seeing them cry touched my heart. Saying goodbye to the sisters I have worked with and done exchanges with was also very hard- particularly those I have served with for months and truly seen them grow. I will forever be invested in them and their growth. Because who you sacrifice for and serve, you love. We had our last lesson with Marsha- it was very tearful on her part. I will never forget what she told me. She said, "Sister Bertoldo- I want to thank you for listening to me. and understanding me. because of how you listened, i knew and felt you understood me, and that made me feel more comfortable to explore the gospel, and ask the hard questions when i would normally shut down" she started crying then said, "I want you to know that because you have listened and understood I have come closer to christ and to God." I will never forget that. it struck me when she said that, because that is literally our purpose, we state it every morning,"to invite others to come unto Christ"- I thought of all the weeks of teaching her, all the lessons, preparation, prayers and efforts that had gone into teaching her and really trying to discern her needs and allow the spirit to teach her (I know He is who really teaches not me) and all I could feel welling in my heart is that ALL OF IT WAS WORTH IT. We taught Shanon the full Plan of Salvation, which has been a goal of mine for months. It went great- the spirit was there. I feel I have done my part with her teaching, and that feels so good. I love you all. I look forward to hugging every single one of you.

All My love,

Sister Bertoldo

P.S.

I forget to tell you about the 4th of July! We went to this huge festival at Tom Brown park so that we could contact people and hand out pass along cards, Book of Mormons, and talk about Family History work! it was EXHAUSTING! We contacted for 2 hours! but it was so much fun- we met so many cool people and planted a lot of seeds that will sprout and grow later. I loved it. It was a good way to go. missionary work at its finest.